In 19 days, I will have a college freshman on her own out there in the big bad world.  I have tried many times to breathe through the sadness and fear that I dwells inside of me, but each day I find something else to worry about.  It isn't that I think she will not be safe, that really is the least of it, I know she has a good head on her shoulders.  I just can't fathom the thought that her room will be empty more than full during each of the next 4 years.  This is really what we, as parents, are supposed to do? Watch them toddle around, pick them up, and then send them off? I am beyond sad, if there could be such a place.  
I know her sister is trying to keep a smile on her face, but when day 19 gets here and she has to say goodbye, that will be the hardest of all.  I will have to watch my 2 most precious gifts break as they give one last hug before going in different directions.  I cry as I type, my throat tightens, and I am choked up.  That moment is the moment when I will finally break.

Mother/Daughter Friday

Today I spent the whole day with Big Miss (Jessica).  We had the best time together.  I will miss these days when she leaves on the 19th, so I am going to soak in all this mother/daughter goodness for a while.  We stopped by my classroom, went shopping, had lunch and then we went to see Harry Potter.  It was amazing to see how she reacted the same way Little Miss did when I saw it with her on opening night.  I am glad that I got to share this movie with each of them separately, it made the ending of an era even more special.  I am trying not to count the days left, but they are lingering there in the back of my mind.

I Break, When They Are Broken

The hardest part about being a mommy for me, has and always will be watching my children cry because of something that is out of my control.  Both of my girls are dancers, they have been dancing since they were 3 years old.  My oldest left dance last year because someone hurt her so much, it stole her passion for the art.  So, her senior year went by, danceless.  She left the team and unfortunately, left her sister on the team without her.  This mommy lost her chance of seeing her girls dance together just one more time.  Hopefully my big Miss will re-enter the world of dance while she is away at college.  I know her heart wants it, her mind just has to catch up.
So today, little miss came home from dance intensives in tears.  She is the junior co captain of the team this year and now she too feels that her passion is being squelched.  It just seems that this team isn't at its best, again, and my little one doesn't want to suffer the growing pains of a new team with a new coach.  So, she cried, a lot.  I suffered, a lot.  She doesn't want to quit, but she knows that she also doesn't want to stay on next year as a senior. You see, this daughter, this amazing girl, wants to dance on Broadway or for a professional Company at some point in her life.  Time will tell..... In the meantime, I will have to be here to wipe the tears from her milky face and keep my tears inside, because I am the mommy and I have to make everything ok.

My Little Miss

Happy Days

My oldest returned from her 8 day trip away from home and we have had the best time since she came home.  We watched movies, laughed, and just had some sweet moments together.  I wish mister didn't work so much because he misses out on so much, but he is a provider for his girls, we are blessed.  Little miss was very happy to see her sister and I have heard them laughing deep into the night, when they should be sleeping, but who cares!  These moments are going to be over all to quickly in a few weeks and little miss and myself will probably spend late nights crying into our pillows missing Jessica. The next few weeks will be filled with some memory making moments, many of them will be shared with you, but some will be kept deep in our hearts for us to return to when we need to smile.  Our hearts will be filled......

Missing Jessica........ This is Only Practice!

Jessica has been gone since Tuesday and guess what.... she has called me every single day, sometimes way more than once.  It makes me feel great because I am hoping this is a view of the way it will be when she leaves to college.  I can truly see that she misses her mommy and I think she just calls to hear my voice (conceited, I know, but I really feel that way) because most of the time she has nothing to say, so we just listen to each other do whatever it is we are doing at the time.  All in all, this trip to New England was a great chance for her to see something other than the hot, sunny Florida she is use to.  It also has set her on a journey that will be filled with many nights of wonder and awe as she searches for the woman she is to become.
Thank you Lord for this blessing in disguise.

Another Comment Tutorial (adding a share button)

As I have said, I am definitely not an expert.  I always turn here for expert blogging help:

However, when I am commenting on a giveaway that has asked me to blog about it, tweet it, add it to my FB page, etc.  it is much easier when the share buttons are on your blog.  This makes all of these requests a click away, rather than having to copy and paste it to my blog.  There may be another way, but this was the easiest for me.

1. Click on the design tab in your dashboard.
2. Click on the edit button in your blog posts box.
3.  When the configure your blog post pop up shows, scroll down to show share buttons.
4.  Click in the box to check off that you do want to show the share buttons.
5. Scroll all the way down and click save.

That's it, now your requests are a click away!

Comment Forms

I know there have been several posts about comment forms on various blogs and I am sure Kristen over at Ladybug Teaching Resources has a video for us, but I just want to post this today.  So many times we go to comment on a post, especially a giveaway post, and it becomes so tedious because we have to go through many previous comments to get to the bottom and post our own. Some of us still have the spam controlling "enter this code" come up before our comment is posted, you really don't need this either.  You can eliminate this by doing the following:

1.  Go to the settings tab on your blog dashboard.
2.  Go to the comments tab.
3.  Under Comment Form Placement click "pop up window".
4.  Under Show Word Verification, click no.
5.  Save your settings

This will really help out your followers and make it less tiring to comment on your posts and enter your giveaways!


Harry Potter, How Do I Love Thee? Let Me Count The Ways.....

From the minute we met, I loved you like no other wizard before you!  You filled me up with your magic.

The Chamber of Secrets was akin to the chamber of my heart, filled with secrets of one day becoming a wizard just like you.

The prisoner of your every move is more like it (I mean me..).  Oh what I wouldn't do to have you rescue me.

Who wouldn't drink from a goblet of fire for you?  Of course, that's not quite what was meant, but the fire in my brain was quenched with this installment.

This quickly became my new favorite!  A whole team of secret wizards, oh be still my magical heart.  This was the first time I re-read immediately after finishing.

Half Blood? No, it couldn't be.  Your blood is filled with nothing but the love of James and Lilly Potter, so reading was a must to find out exactly who could possibly be the half-blood prince.  My addiction to all things Harry continued.

Dear Ms. Rowling, please don't let it be true?  Is this it?  Is this all I have to left of my wizardly love?  Tears stain the pages of this treasure on my shelf and I can't breathe.

I awoke after seeing you last night at 1:00 a.m and felt an emptiness in my chamber of secrets that the order of the phoenix will never secure for me again. Your last time on the big screen had me crying the minute it began, for this was the beginning of the end.  Then, I found this!  A question mark????  Could it be? Could there be just one more, two, infinity? I know, why prolong the pain, the hurt, the healing.... I will take another hit, gladly, for you. My wand is held high in homage to an era of literature that all ages may never see again or will we......

Woot Woot, Scholarship Finalist!

Jessica just got the news that she is a finalist for the UCF Alumni Scholarship!  We are invited to the announcement dinner on July 28th, so the prayers are being sent up and good thoughts are being thought!  Congratulations to my baby!


She Left on A Jet Plane

Well, it has been an entire 24 hours without sleep for me, but it was worth it.  Last night was the night before Jessica's big trip with her best friend today.  Mr. had to be at work at 3 am, so he went to sleep.  The girls and I cuddled in Jessica's bed and watched silly, stupid movies until it was time for Jessica to leave for the airport.  She embarked on her first trip as an adult, without us.... her first time ever on an airplane.... so, I am still awake.  It is useless to go to sleep now, I have an entire day ahead of me to worry, lol.
She landed safely and she is now on her adventure, I can only give my worries to Him and have faith that He will keep her safe while she is away.  I pray she takes in all the glory and history that she will see, the fun and silliness of being on the cusp of college and still act like a kid, and that she will close her eyes and thank Him for all of it.

Practice Makes Perfect

This Tuesday Jessica will be leaving on an 8 day trip with her best friend, giving me the chance to practice for when she leaves for college on August 19th..... This will only be the 2nd time in 18 years that she has traveled without us and I am more nervous then ever.  She will be with her friend's family, but she is flying alone with her friend and will sight-see alone with her friend.  I am so proud of her independence and I know she will be more than ok, but a mom is a mom and I am worried. Images of the movie "Taken" fill my mind and just don't leave!  I am my own worst enemy when it comes to this stuff, but it is what it is.

How do you cope when your children are out in the world far away from you?

Migraines Are Slowing Me Down

Last week I had a migraine from Tuesday to Friday, this week it was Wednesday till today..... I can't do anything when I am like this.  I have so much to do and these migraines keep coming fast and furious.  I don't have a doctor's appointment until August, so I am praying that I will make it until then.

Catching Up, A Sunday Ritual

Sunday has really never been a day of rest for me, it has always been the day where I play catch up.  Catch up with the laundry, the bathrooms, the lesson plans, the blogging, the groceries, the......, you get the idea.  Last year I bought a subscription to the Sunday paper thinking it would be a way for me to save money cutting coupons.  Well, I cut the coupons and always forget them, lol.  So the saving money part is neither here nor there.
However, the Sunday paper does play into my catch up theory about Sundays.  I catch up on all the news, the gossip, and everything that other normal people had time to hear about during the week.  I spend every single Sunday morning on the couch with my paper, my bottled water, and my puppy.  I read the paper from cover to cover, I mean every single word.  I have always been an avid reader and I believe in reading everything to the end, even if I find halfway through that I hate what I am reading.  It's that whole start what you finish attitude.
Today I made a huge mistake and played catch up with an infomercial, yes ladies, I am the proud owner of 6 GENIE BRAS!!!!  Oh well, they will serve their purpose, I suppose.  Just don't tell my husband how much I spent (when I should have been cutting coupons to pretend I was actually saving something).

Before and Afters

I am thinking about my Sundays after August 21st, when Jessica is at college and I am here.  What will I be catching up on then?  Will it be our time to talk about our week or will she be busy catching up with her new found freedom from, well, catching up with mom?  Whatever the case, I will still be found on my couch with the paper, my bottled water, and my puppy.  Catching up.......