It's Official

Throughout the years as a mom, I have heard the phrase "it's official" for many different reasons.  From being chosen for the part in the school play to graduating with top honors and everything in between.  The only time that phrase tears at my heart and makes me worry for days on end is when my beautiful daughters say "it's official, I have a boyfriend".  Now, my youngest has never said this, even though she is 17, because she doesn't give her heart away very easily.  My oldest, however, has...more than once...and this time she is away at college living in an apartment and has made it official with the boy man downstairs.

I tried, I really tried to sound enthusiastic, but she heard it in my voice.  She heard the worry and the not so sure feeling of mom in a panic.  So she texted me and asked if I was happy for her.  Well, that hit me where it hurts because I am happy, of course I relish in the happiness of my children.  I assured her that I was happy and then went on the mom rant of be safe, school and work come first, make sure he respects your decisions, etc. etc. etc.  When what I really wanted to say was "DO NOT HAVE SEX".  Yes that is the gist of it, I can't even fathom, nor do I want to.

I know you understand, I know you feel my pain.  I want my 3 year old ballerina back, now.  Long gone are the days of worrying about scraped knees and mean girls.  Worrying about sex and all the crap that comes along with it, I'm not ready.  If I'm not ready, is she?