T-19

In 19 days, I will have a college freshman on her own out there in the big bad world.  I have tried many times to breathe through the sadness and fear that I dwells inside of me, but each day I find something else to worry about.  It isn't that I think she will not be safe, that really is the least of it, I know she has a good head on her shoulders.  I just can't fathom the thought that her room will be empty more than full during each of the next 4 years.  This is really what we, as parents, are supposed to do? Watch them toddle around, pick them up, and then send them off? I am beyond sad, if there could be such a place.  
I know her sister is trying to keep a smile on her face, but when day 19 gets here and she has to say goodbye, that will be the hardest of all.  I will have to watch my 2 most precious gifts break as they give one last hug before going in different directions.  I cry as I type, my throat tightens, and I am choked up.  That moment is the moment when I will finally break.